…………. but until then All I Can Do Is Wait

I have been feeling rotten for a couple of days, the constant nauseated feeling and the electrifying headache is such a bother. Not mentioning the fever and the night sweats, it is so annoying. Even the sounds of the TV is annoying to me, I told hubby to just be there but no need to talk, I don’t like the sound of sounds when I am being annoyed by the monsters that’s tickling and invading the peace of my body.

I am at the moment where I don’t have the feeling to talk to anybody, I don’t want to laugh or joke or smile and I am not going to fake anything for anyone.

Last night I had some weird dreams, it was one of those dreams that you wanted to come out of it as fast as you can and not try to retrace that moment at all. When I got up, I felt tired but at the same time I don’t know exactly what’s wrong either. I cannot explain this in words to try and make anyone to understand.

I realized that more than anything in this world that I wanted now is to be alone; people are no longer comforting to me. It is the sound of silence that is so entertaining to me, it is so peaceful, so bliss and breathtaking. At least when I am alone no one will constantly ask me what is wrong.

But I know this time will soon pass, the flowers are all blooming, the trees are all green, and the view from above could not be more magnificent. With such a surrounding I know I will be back to be myself again.

…………. but until then all I can do is wait.