Lesson Learned

Between a taxi driver who could not speak English but played the song “I’m the only girl” by Rihana for me, and for 10 minutes forcing me to hold on to my dear life while he drives around narrow lanes like Ayrton Senna did in the tunnel of Monaco, and proudly telling me “I am Turkish”.

And

A doctor whose clinic was located in an upmarket mansion, with everything in leather from his polished white shoes to the white leather chairs, and white leather patient’s bed. The area is so exclusive that it makes it more eerie when the fact that there was not a single soul in existence to assist him. After a few minutes of explanation he ushered me to the room with the white leather bed, my response was ‘No’.

Looking dejected we came back sitting at his table and before I can even warm my chair he again came round to me and asked me to go back to the room. This went on for a couple more times, but each time, the response he got from me was ‘No’.

My hands were drenched with sweat of nervousness and I was scared to death, only to be saved by a phone call from my husband. I cannot deny that he is a very good doctor, but what the **** was he thinking of. Leaving his mansion was one of the most anticipated moments for me that day.

Lesson Learned

Never take a taxi with a driver who looks like Antonio Banderas, and never trust a doctor by his mansion.

Wien Oh Wien, I am still wondering why you are voted as the 4th safest place to live in in the world. Lord save us.

Is It A Rule?

Is it a rule to have breakfast, lunch and dinner?

Is it a rule to have good communication in a relation?

Is it a rule to answer your phone like a million times in a day?

Is it a rule to read and wait for your email?

Is it a rule to love and to be loved?

Is it a rule to cook, iron, wash and keep the house tidy?

Is it a rule to keep on anticipating your behavior?

Is it a rule to listen and being taken advantage of?

Is it a rule to feel sad when you are sad?

Go figure

Wait a minute…………………..

Is it a rule to breathe and keep on breathing?

Only Then

Only when the last tree has been cut down

Only when the last river has been poisoned

Only when the last fish has been caught

Only then will you find that money cannot be eaten.

Author - an American Indian 

Name - Unknown

Amal and Curly

Amal, I saw this and it reminded me of you and Curly (lol)

Is That You Dilbert?

Happy Birthday Honey............................ *smile*

Can There Still Be Love?

Sometimes I feel that this family is cursed, yeah, it is strange. From ever since I was young I have seen too much bickering. I saw the injustice that my own father was put through, I witnessed how domineering my mother was, I saw the constant silent war between my grandma, my grandfather, my mother, my aunties, my uncles and many other family members.

Then I was happy that the eight siblings were united, were happy as kids, were close but not too close. We grew up like normal siblings, quarrelling, fighting, and taking sides, sharing, loving, remembering and much more. However, as we grew older, cracks began to be develop, first it was just some imaginary cracks, and then it became deeper cracks until it is totally broken.

The childhood quarrelling now had built up to adulthood war. Everyone thinks they are prefect, everyone thinks that they have the power to rule, everyone knows too much of everyone else. We talk but we are no longer listening, we laugh but we are no longer laughing, we love but we are no longer feeling, we cry but we are no longer sharing.

Public display of affection is only for show. What could have possibly gone wrong? Is it the air that we breathe? Is it the blood that is no longer thicker than water? Is it the greed of being accepted by others? Is it simply the curse of fate that had taken us too far away from where we began? A humble beginning of two wonderful parents with eight siblings, a herd of goats, a plantation of vegetables, a green colored home with lots of chicken running around, and love to keep us warm.

I fear the curse is here to stay, I fear the break of my own family. Can there still be love?

Where do I begin?

I Am Tired Of The Mess

Fuck this

Fuck you

I am tired of the mess

I feel the anger rise up in me

The same anger that you fire up always

You thought you had me

Sorry but you don’t

You live in such denial

Just know that time will not heal the pain you cause in me!!!!!!

Do You Know?

This morning hubby and I woke up early; we choose not to have breakfast together, even when he offered to take me to that Bio restaurant. I was tempted but something inside me just was not in for it.

He went to work on his new scooter that I bought as an early birthday gift. It lights up my heart when I see him happy with just a simple thing as a new scooter. I had another day at the doctor, it never stops or maybe it will someday. I hope so.

For some strange reasons I felt that I am missing my three angels so much. Maybe I was excited about something, maybe it is just that contemplation of doing silly things with them that I am pining for, I know not.

Today I am so not in my blogging mood, but I just need to share my virtual excitement of nothing over nothing. It is just an inner untold feeling of a wife and a mother. I thought it would be interesting to just jot that down, no not about my untold feelings, but just how I am feeling.

I don’t want to pretend that I understand what the untold feelings are all about and why things are happening the way they are. However, I am confident that there is a reason for everything.

But do you know why do bad things happen and why do bad people live lavishly?

Do you know?

Life Ball 2011

What I learned from the Life Ball of May 21, 2011:

That men love to play dress up, high heels, handbags and glitters

That the Life Ball which is created for HIV awareness is more like a gay parade

That though gays and lesbians are no longer a strange phenomenon but their behavior is still a heap load of puzzle and shame

That the UNICEF representative is better at playing the violin then delivering a decent speech

That Brooke Shields still looks pretty despite the mess up of cue cards

That Bill Clinton and Janet Jackson were just filling up the gap

And last but not least the whole celebration is just a waste of money, time and human energy, when all these resources could be put to good use in the name of HIV awareness and in spreading the wings of tolerance.

So much for a Life Ball………………………

Fight My Angels

I taught my children, I taught my children how to fight. They have to learn to fight for their rights; they have to know that when they are right nothing is to be spared.

Chef Diva has got the best of this now, she is super smart and I know no one will mess around with her. My Medic Princesses is still very diplomatic where fighting for her rights is concerned, unless I am not offering the help, she will then put up for her stand. Now that she is in the real rat world I hope she will have a tongue like my Chef Diva too.

What can I write about my little angel, well as the name goes, she is an angel, always peaceful and subtle. I am teaching her to do what she needs to do, when she needs to do and not be afraid. She is now living on her own among friends yet strangers in a dormitory life.

Once on a winter evening, someone purposely asked her if she can give her jacket for her to use. Alright……… wait a minute; do you think that is appropriate or part of showing the act of bullying? My smart little angel lashed at her (diplomatically of course), and the next minute she left my little angel alone with her tail between her legs (ha ha ha).

Today, like many other days she told me that she could not eat the food there, because the food was really horrible. I challenged her to go and talk to the house mom, precisely, she was hesitant at first but after a few coaxing she went to face her challenge.

My little angel, I want you to be a fighter for your own right always.

Let's Legalize Weed

 

 

 

 

 

Legalize the usage of weed; this has been a long time debate. The pros and the cons, the yes and the no and the why not?

We had a first-hand opportunity to be among demonstrators seeking the legalization of this matter recently.

People are naturally absurd; being among these demonstrators can only make us feel like we belong. The absurdities of the demonstrators are calm, peaceful and most interestingly very informative.

I was daring enough to take the challenge of drinking the tea made from the flowers of the plant. It tasted just like any other ordinary herbal tea, but one thing I can vouch for is that after the tea all the pain that I was experiencing in the joint of my hip joint were totally gone. That evening I did an almost 5km walk without any pain at all. This is to prove the medicinal value of the plant.

If the tea is available in the market, I will not hesitate using it to curb the constant nagging pain that I am experiencing for almost four years now.

So should we now make alcohol and cigarettes illegal, taking into consideration the far worse implications from its usage? Let’s ponder for a moment, to the logic of one being legal while the other not.

Do you think that there is a hidden agenda somewhere?

Let's Say Goodbye

It is getting too crowded there, suddenly and at a time that we least expect it to be.

I have to take the angels out, it is pointless, it is horrible, and the experience is no longer valuable to them.

Where we go, no one should know, where we are is no one’s business, where we will be is merely our own choice.

The place of our destination should be full of peace, no malaise, no hatred, no gossip mongers, and no one of a value that is below our expectation.

Where we go the sky will always be smiling, the beaches will always be gleaming white, the ocean so blue and the grass will always be greener.

It is getting too crowded there, let’s say goodbye down under.

Thank You - Body Shop

Thank you to Body Shop for the nice surprise. It is so nice to be appreciated. Wish my little angel is here to choose what she wants.

His Friday And My Friday

 

 

 

 

 

His Friday and my Friday = our Friday

First it was the diagnostic laboratory – blood, blood and more blood

Then to the dentist – he had to do an operation on one of the root canals. Like a baby, he requested that I be allowed to sit in the room during the procedure. The smell of the anesthetic was making me high, and in the end I don’t know who were more sedated he or me?

When he was done, I was surprised at the way he looked. His face was lob sided due to the swelling from the operation. There were stitches on the gum, it was gross. Seeing him in this situation made me forget that I was also in pain.

As we walked back I can only pray that we will grow old together, for there is no one else that I would rather be with than him.

Smear Campaign

When you were telling the world about how bad I am, in exchange for some quick bucks, how were you feeling then? I bet you must be thinking that you owe the world. Do you ever feel cheap and low having to sell the story of someone else for your own benefit? I guess no, never, rather to you it must be a great achievement as the bucks will keep on rolling as long as they are buying your stories.

Now I heard the tables are being turned against you, there are smear campaign about you. For your information, no I am not rejoicing in your time of misery, but I am praying to the Lord to open your eyes. It must be so nasty for someone to not have an inch of dignity to halt and ponder for a while before spreading lies about someone else. Does it cause you to have sleepless nights when you are being slandered in the public eyes? Does it make you feel rotten and hollow because whatever you try to say does not make any difference anymore? Well, you are now eating your own humble pie. Again, don’t get me wrong I wish not for the world to turn against you.

I am someone who does not really believe in the prophecy of “what goes around comes around”, neither do I think karma plays such an important role in my Islamic upbringing. However, when the nastiness of your own act comes knocking on your doors, I can only imagine how small that makes you feel.

You published out so boldly that your house that was built on lies about other peoples` lives will be delivered soon or should already been delivered. I hope it will not be a house of miseries, as some unhappy spirit might come and haunt you there.

Bow to the Lord will you, seek His forgiveness and let Him plant only nobility in your heart.

May you be at peace.

Therme Wien

We took her to the new Therme Wien just for relaxation after all the flight ordeal that she had gone through. This is Europe’s biggest and most modern city spa, and it is our first time there.

This is a spa with sulphur healing that is and was popular even amongst the Romans. We had a lot of fun, and cheered her on to dive into the four meter pool. Hubby attempted the one meter while she went for the three meter, then they both went on the ride, while I stayed in the warm pool and waited for them.

We were there for three hours and wished that we had gone there earlier.

Anxiety Of Defiance

I have deleted so many numbers on my phone, and guess what? It feels lighter.
I am loving it
“my own quote” – following an anxiety of defiance.

So You Are Stressed?

 

 

 

 

 

So you are stressed? Take time out and do a shoulder and back massage. Drink ginger tea and chill. Life is too short, so why regret it when you are six feet under.

You Keep Your Grades

 

 

 

 

 

 

My little angel had one journey that she will remember for a long long time. I hope what does not kill her can only make her a better person, a more experienced person and someone who will now be able to fight for her own rights always.

I am also glad that she got to spend a night with her eldest sister finally. She was pampered with love and got to eat what she had requested for, and most importantly they had loads of fun for that short period of time.

You keep your grades and I will keep my promise ok ……….. *wink* *wink*

Typical Mom

On Mother’s Day I was given a stalk of yellow rose, but I don’t like roses, to be polite I took it. However, I am so not going to be seen walking around with a stalk of rose in my hand so I decided to leave it on the table where I was seated for dinner. Thank you anyways.

Today I had to go and get some laundry soap, the weather was nice and the walk will do me good. As usual when I am in this shop I will be lost with inspecting items on the shelf. It is therapeutic for me to immerse myself enjoying the products and also more than often I will leave the shop with things that I did not plan to buy. At the cashier I was given an envelope with the word “Alles Liebe, BIPA”, I smiled at the cashier as she said Happy Birthday to me. It was nice, but I wish I know when my birthday is.

When I arrived home I received a call from the airline, they were keeping me posted on the lost hand luggage for my little angel when they had to run out of the plane following an emergency landing. The bag has been missing since April 29, 2011. We have now become friends because it is hopeless to be angry with them and reasoning is not working, so being friends makes all of us feel good.

During the conversation, she said something that made my day. She said you sounded like a typical mom, who wanted to make sure that everything is alright with your child anytime anywhere. That word “typical mom” just put me on cloud nine, I don’t know why, but I am a typical mom and yes I do worry about each and every one of my kids.

My day will not be complete if I do not talk to each and every one of them. I will be hurting more when they get hurt, I will be crying more when they cry, I feel them, their happiness, loneliness, pain and all.

Darling, I am your typical mom.

Carefree

The reflection of her smile, we took her to Baden but unfortunately everything was closed because of the public holiday. These pictures were captured on the way back from Baden and the sun was shining to enable this effect.

I love the carefree cheeky side of her always.